perfect Brooklyn day

I don’t twitter, because I figure no one’s really interested in all the mundane things I do day after day.  For example, today was one of my best kind of days, and reaffirms my love of the city: I *walked* everywhere I needed to go!  To the post office (to mail back my license plates), then the botanic garden (where the roses are wildly blooming), then the library (where I stopped in to sign some copies of Bird for the Tween Book Club and checked out Persepolis for Edi’s summer book club), the copy shop (where I Fedexed my car title to the new owner, lost my wallet for 30 seconds and nearly had a heart attack), the pharmacy (to pick up new allergy meds), my favorite Thai place for lunch (Mango on 7th Ave.), Cousin John’s for a red velvet cupcake, the corner store for some milk, and then to the train station–and home!  After I ate half the super-large lunch portion of vegetable pad thai and corn patties (for just $6.50!), I checked my email and found two lovely messages from two of the librarians I met yesterday–one gave my name to another branch librarian, and the other thanked me for the visit and said several students came by today asking for a copy of my YA novel–they’re adding it to their collection!  But this is the best part of my Brooklyn day: I ate my cupcake (yum!), fell asleep (woke at 5am today), and woke to find this email in my inbox–I almost thought it was spam, until I slowed down and read it again:

…I was listening to your story and I kept staring at you… I too have struggled with an addict in my family… my sister has been addicted to crack cocaine for the past 11 years…She stole everything in the household as well… she’s been arrested 9 times so far and she told me that she hated me and she ran away… now she is 28… I have been trying to find her for so long.. Thanks for your story… it made me see that it is a disease… and its nobody’s fault..

This came from a student who attended my presentation yesterday.  Sometimes when I talk about my family, I worry that I’m coming off as an egomaniac, one of those endlessly self-referential artists who can’t stop saying, “I,I,I…”  But I think honesty and transparency strip away the veil of perfection we cast over others (and sometimes over ourselves).  If people think I look calm and relaxed, then they should know just how anxious I am at times.  If they think I’m some princess who grew up in a castle, then they should know just how desperate our lives were back in the day.  For me, it always comes back to that quote from Audre Lorde: “Your silence will not protect you.”  Life isn’t perfect.  No family is perfect.  Hiding or denying dysfunction doesn’t make it go away, but talking about pain is the first step towards healing and building a new community.  This has been a beautiful day…